Once you were innocent

Once, probably a long time ago,

something happened that hurt your innocence.

And it left its mark inside your matrix.

Someone, something, broke into your sacred space

And took from you your trust,

leaving in its place

its own guilt and

(because even the robber was  once innocent)

it felt shame at its own behaviour,

and it left you covered with its shame.

Sadly enough stolen trust often turns into

guilt and shame also,

so even the robber was poorer for his heist.

Now shame always clothes itself

It cannot bear freedom or nakedness

because it feels that it doesn't deserve it.

So, depending on its surroundings,

it dons veils, costumes or coats of armor.

Sometimes shame comes out in disguises

the perfectly polite little girl

The femme fatale who cannot find love,

the boy wonder

the Don Juan who abandons his passion over and over.

Or it strides out with all its weapons at the

ready, defending everyone's honor but its own.

Or maybe it grows up to steal honor from others

who are innocent as it once was.

Sometimes shame simply hides a lot

as much as it can and still survive.

So frequently it will sabotage any kind of success

that might prevent it from hiding in its own unique way.

It can hide on a stage under spotlight if it has to -

but it will often seek out a drug

to medicate itself with afterwards...

(which is why our cultural stars often have a hard

time keeping it together that way).

Ah shame has such a need for love.

But deep inside

where it most needs to be held and tended

is where it feels the most distrust.

A feeling so old, so primal

that it feels and reacts before thought

or ordinary conscious intelligence.

And pushes away

the very person or event that

would most deeply heal it.

Sometimes it will even see a healing miracle

as a danger to its life or being

and then it may try to harm or destroy the very thing or one

Who could most help it..

Would you like to experience life in freedom?

Ground is what is beneath us.

Soil is made up of the past.

The compost of eternity

will grow whatever seeds you choose to plant

But first lets uproot the old unwanted plantlife

and let the soil rest awhile.

Do you know how to  empty your mind?

There are many ways.

To let go of your thoughts is to uproot the past.

To let go of your beliefs about life is to rest

the soil.

To let go of them completely takes either

great luck or great skill

If you are lucky enough to be skilled

in meditation of the kind

that stills your mind,

then hone that skill level

Hold the tide of thought back

from your center

hold the space there - let it stay open

there are other winds of the cosmos

which blow through inner space and

by your  courage and concentration

you can rest your consciousness

and wrest your soul free from the

beliefs that bind you...

But if the inner world of stillness is foreign to you

Or it's very stormy or cloudy in there,

then there are other ways clear the atmosphere...

1  Sex as a tool for freedom

 Pleasure generates vibrational patterns centred

in the present

Our bodies are built somewhat resonant

all the way into the bones

Some  sounds and vibrations can shake us so

thoroughly that we can, by preprogramming our

bio-computer,  toss the old stuff (belief systems

build themselves upon memories bound to them by

shock or trauma) out into the orgasmic vortex of

release. At the cellular level, this is the basis

of sexual healing. As an all-encompassing act

of  love, it may be only possible for this to

occur safely in the presence of one who has

profound  agape - the kind of love that can go

beyond its personal needs for another. This person

can be  oneself... but one may need a  mirror to

keep one focused. More

2  Sound as a tool for freedom

Sound can be expressed from the bindings of our

ego - cloth,

or it can be encouraged, coaxed guided or shocked

into emerging from our deepest depths, from there

it can  catch the cloth that bound us and we can

experience the bliss of nakedness. It may terrify

us at first, but we will know that we have touched

ourelves in a holy way - we shall always remember

the  true sounds that we make in this body.

3  Wilderness, nature and our ancient roots

Immersing oneself in nature - alone or in agreed

upon silence if in a group or partnership. Again

by  preprogramming the bio-computer  one can

dissolve one's debris into the soil. Rhythms,

indigenous ceremonies have long understood the

politics of healing - the interweaving between

body, mind, soul, spirit and the consciousness of

others both seen and unseen.  By honoring the

interconnectedness of all life forms we can

develop  communion with animals, plants, rocks and

trees.

4 redesigning the form

Tendencies literally grow into our tendons  and

affect our musculature.  To re-de - sign is to

first remove the old signature

and then to imprint a new one.

Workout the old stuff with  yoga & bodywork

stretching out tight patterns in the body

Do some fasting and drink masses of great water

Then work in the new consciousness

it will subtly or overtly, change your structure

It may so deeply unravel your

tension that the organs function differently

If you relax it will be ultimately always be for the better.

Develop the muscles after you have

released the old tendon-cies.

5 Healing goes on and on

spiralling , gradually swirling itself into a new color

a more joyful, peaceful, fulfilling way of being.

Gradual healing is deep and lasting,

Be patient, and kind with yourself

and with those you encounter in life.

Forgiveness is like relaxing

everything get's easier when you do.

We are all another you